In a Nutella world, we at Fermy were always the odd ones out. Our CEO, Jif, was always picked on in school for playing with peanuts, rather than hazelnuts. Years of getting picked on made him all the more resilient and determined to defeat the status quo. Now, 12 years earlier, we are here, bringing you the largest network of intergalactic peanut butter in the worlds.
Jif's passion for interdimensional peanut butter stems from an unresolved cognitive dissonance trauma, resulting from a game of twister. He's ok now, but demands a frozen orange every morning, for no reason.
An extensive network of well-informed and well-traveled chimpanzees keeps our business on the road to success. Calvé travels all over the world and through spacetime to find that one peanut to perfect a new blend.
We're kind of unsure what he does or who is paying him, but his hair was shiny from eating peanut butter, so we decided to keep him. Seriously, we don't even have doorknobs, we have those cool Star Trek sliding doors.
It was the great Lambor Ghini, creator of Zip Lock Bag Decoration Stickers, who once said: "Who am I? Are hedge trimmers edible?"
We've adopted those words as our corporate philosophy and our employees take it to heart. The result? We've been named Maxim's Hot 100 Hottest Company for the 4th time in a row. We were 10th in Traffic Light Magazine's list of 'Companies Most Likely To End Up 9th On Our List.' And Jif's grandmother sends us muffin baskets every week.
We recognize talent when we see it. Do you think you got what it takes? Apply today!